Why Premarital Counseling?

What is the point of premarital counseling?

Many people often think that if you go to premarital counseling that your relationship must be rocky and that you probably shouldn’t get married. Unfortunately, there is still a negative stigma to receiving help in our community and this stigma, often leads couples and individuals to say, “I don’t feel that bad, we’ll get through it and be fine.” Other couples say, “why do we need premarital counseling? We’re totally happy and we know that we want to spend the rest of our lives together!”
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My answer to those questions are not related to solving problems or fixing an issue, but this is a chance for you and your partner to learn about yourselves and to be able to learn relationship skills that will lead you to have a successful relationship.
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Learning how to control yourself in your relationship 

While in premarital counseling, you will learn more about yourself when it comes to being stressed or upset. Which will happen at some point in your relationship and you must be able to know how to control your own emotions before having a positive interaction with someone else.
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Learning relationship skills

​Together, you and your partner will learn how to create a solid relationship foundation that you will be able to rely and trust on. This will help you connect on a deeper level and will boost your intimacy.

You and your partner will also have a chance to learn about your relationship expectations and your partner's expectations. Expectations are often different between partners and sometimes talking about these differences can be awkward. For instance, talking about the differences when it comes to how often you will have sex, how much you plan to save for your first home and how you will do that, how you will raise your children, and if the situation arises, who’s career will take priority. To be able to have these conversations, you will also need to have a pretty good communication skill set in your back pocket.
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Which leads me to something else couples will learn. Communication! Learning how to handle conflict and stressful moments, while still showing your partner that you care and respect them is key to relationship success.

Is premarital counseling worth it?

Premarital counseling is a time to grow together as a couple. It’s a time to share some of your fears and a way to learn how to support each other. The skills you learn while in premarital counseling will help you build a solid foundation for your relationship.

The average wedding cost in Texas is about $27,000 - $32,000 and the cost for premarital counseling, if you go through one my packages ranges from $100 - $950 which is literally less than 2% of what you are spending on one day.
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Added benefits to premarital counseling 

The state of Texas has an initiative where if couples take a qualified premarital class, they can save $60 on their marriage license and waive the 72 hour waiting period! Lucky for you, my premarital class is qualified through this initiative.

If you feel uncomfortable going to a counseling session and feel awkward about sharing your life with someone else, that it totally normal! I have recently created an online relationship class that couples can take in the comfort of their own home and still receive the relationship skills that will help them have a successful relationship.

Couples who have taken a premarital course are more satisfied with their relationship than other couples and are less likely to end in divorce. 

Take some time to invest in your marriage, which will last much longer than your wedding day. ​

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By: Priscilla Rodriguez, LMFT

A Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in San Antonio, TX who specializes in working with couples who are dating, engaged, newlyweds, or married for many years. Take an online relationship class or participate in an upcoming couples workshop as a way to invest in your relationship.