Long-Distance Relationships and Technology

I know I have previously mentioned the importance of setting boundaries with technology in your relationship, but I wanted to share some ways in which it may be helpful in long-distance relationships. 

Obviously, the use of technology in long-distance relationships is crucial! That’s the only thing you have to consistently stay connected with your partner (of course, this is not counting the small surprise gifts, sending postcards, or sending care packages). 

That’s why, it’s important to cover some expectations for when it comes to using technology in your long-distance relationship.
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I also wanted to share that I get that being in a long-distance relationship can be challenging. My husband and I were in a long-distance relationship for five months during the transition of me beginning graduate school and him finishing up undergrad. There were many times that I found it challenging because I went from living with him to suddenly being states away and living alone in a new town. But here are some things that helped me and that other couples have shared that helped them.

How to maintain connection in a long-distance relationship

• Have a schedule of when you are going to check in with each other
  • A text or call in the morning, or perhaps when you are on your way home from work.
• The little mundane things are opportunities to connect
  • I get that you may not want to repeat the same thing repeatedly, but when you are miles apart, sharing these small moments can be a way to connect with your partner in a more intimate way.
  • Try.sending pictures of what is going on or something weird you just saw
• Some Apps to also consider for your long-distance relationship may be:
  • Between
  • Couple Widget

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What helped me when I was in graduate school

Some of the things that my husband and I did when we were in a long-distance relationship were:

• We had the “find my friend” feature turned on
  • Now before you jump into the “you only do this if you don’t trust each other” mentality, this is more regarding safety. I do know the dark side of tracking people on your phone because of lack of trust, but for the sake of this blog, I wanted to share how this was helpful in a long distance relationship. Like I mentioned previously, I was miles away from friends and family and in a new place I knew nothing about. Even though the people I trusted were miles away, a small part of me felt some sort of security knowing that my partner and my parents could track where I was.  
• We had scheduled “date-nights”
  • During this time, we would FaceTime and watch our favorite movies or eat dinner at the same time. I know, super cheesy! But it was something I would look forward to after a long week and something that we both viewed as a special moment to feel close.

What you will find out in a long-distance relationship

• Quality communication is key! It makes sense that you are somewhat forced to communicate effectively if you want to maintain a relationship with someone who is geographically in a different location. If you have found that opening up can be challenging, be sure to check out this step by step course on how to engage in effective communication.

​So, if you are currently in long-distance relationship, I would love to learn the different things you have found to be helpful in staying connected with your partner.  

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By: Priscilla Rodriguez, M.S., LMFT

As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, I understand that there are different types of relationships, long-distance being one of them! I specialize in working with couples and individuals to restore their relationships by utilizing research-based therapy techniques. Feel free to look at the online services offered through Modern Wellness Counseling and check out the client portal to conveniently schedule your next appointment.